So I am currently sitting on the floor in my apartment. MY APARTMENT. For those of you who don't know, I now live in Hollywood, just off of Hollywood Blvd. below Los Feliz. I love it. My place is huge for just me. I guess I have officialy lived here since December 19, but I didn't start sleeping here until last week. So far, I have had to deal with a blown fuse, the gas company not coming to light the pilot until today, and a few other things, but I feel pretty proud of myself dealing with these things. I never really realized all the stuff that an apartment needs. It has been crazy trying to get it all, and each time I go get something, I come home and think of something else I need. People have been to visit me, which is nice because I get lonely sometimes... lol, not really, but I love having the gang here. Chelsea slept here with me the first night, and we went to the grocery store, made awkward comments at two Mexican 20 somethings (Them: "Hey girl, how you doin?" Me: "Yea okay!") watched Fido, spilled Fruity Pebbles, and, of course, talked about boys.

Speaking of boys, I am in a world of insanity right now, and I don't really know how to get out of it. But that is all I will say on the matter.

Stoked about this weekend. It's Reel Big Fish weekend with the best friend Chelsea Vanilla Bear. Can't wait to skank for hours!


O yea, forgot to mention that Bernie and I went to the Rose Bowl on January 1 to see the Trojans dominate the Illinois Fighting Illini. We had a great time. I got to the Rose Bowl at 330 AM with some family friends, slept in the car, had some food, roamed around with Bernie. We were in the 23rd row behind the goal, next to the Trojan Marching Band, which was awesome. I have never been that close to the field, despite having been to virtually every USC home game since I was 6 months old. O O O. I have a story. So, Bernie and I got into line to go into our tunnel and take our seats, and I said, "I will fucking kill you!" to B (can't remember what we were talking about), and he said it back. This old bitch was standing behind us, and says, "Wow, very nice to cuss in front of others." I just started laughing and told Bernie. I was really tempted to start cussing up a storm. Bernie wanted to say the 7 words you can't say on TV, but we refrained. So in the next few minutes, this lady looks over to an old-timey statue of a football player, and she says to another old hooker standing next to her, "Look at that. That is one of the young men who would go off to World War II and fight for the country... so those QUEERS and MEXICANS can take over." I literally couldn't stop laughing. So, needless to say, we let the old biggot have it, cussing up a storm, let loose those 7 words you can't say on TV. Haha... fucking old skank bag. Okay, that's what I have to say.

PEACE OUT!

-KV

Chels and I saw "Smiley Face" at the Nuart. Dissapointing. A few things were funny, mainly the guy in the back of the theater who wheezed loudly, and our constant references to the corn being like an angel. I really only got the nagging urge to get high, a craving for tacos, and the image of Danny Masterson fucking a skull emblazoned in my memory out of the movie.

I went to Aaron Brothers to get two paintings framed. I learned two things: They play gangsta rap in the backroom. It is a prerequisite to be creepy as fuck to work there. Don't hand me your business card/myspace url... ever.

If you go into a bank, make sure you are not an 18 year old girl. They don't like you.

I love Oatmeal Cookie Chunk ice cream. I lived off of it in Puerto Rico... well that, garlic chicken, plantains, and mojitos. I gained lots of weight while I was there. They don't sell that flavor of ice cream at the Ben n Jerry's stores in the regular United States, only in the grocery store.

My parents bought new everything for the living room: 2 sofas, 46" HDTV, bookshelves, cabinets, HDDVD player, stereo. Just in time for me to move. They sold the old TV, and my mom is keeping the 5 disc DVD player... for music. Not that I would have wanted either of those things, you know, starting out on my own. O well. Just buy me a bed.

The cover picture of a ghost face on the cover of HAUNTED by Chuck Palahniuk glows in the dark. Don't turn off the lights if you don't know that. It's scary.

I can't wait to get a job. I'm sure the second day I have one, I will be whining about it, but right now, I want one. I'll get one as soon as we move.

I think I'm going to spend the day reading in the park tomorrow. Or buy a hat. Can't do both.

I found savings bonds that my dead grandmother gave me. She didn't like me because my middle name is Louise, but she gave me savings bonds. She even spelled my name wrong on them. She usually spelled it "Katey"... not so much. This time she spelled it "Kate." No one ever called me Kate. I already have a nickname as my legal name. There is no need to shorten it anymore.

Football is on Thursday, and I'm psyched. I will take advantage of that 46" HDTV while I'm here dammit.

Sooooo... remember that one time my town is ablaze? I do... it's now. I woke up to the USC Fight Song blaring from my phone around 7am, lept up, yelling CHELSEAAAAA because I knew she was the only once who could be calling (and because I love her... so I scream) because her house was the one the closest to the flames. So she was on voluntary evac at the time, and I looked outside and it was and "Oh SHIT" moment. The fire had wrapped around, down to the bottom of Seco Canyon, which is the bottom of my street and was coming up that way and around to San Fransisquito Canyon Road, which is behind my house... and a hill of brush. So Chelsea and I hung up, promising to text. I went to take a shower, and while I was checking my emails once I got out, my mom came in to tell me it was time to roll. Mad packing frenzy ensued because it was only suggested (voluntary) evacuation. I literally packed everything in my room because fuck that... I mean... if I have the time and the room, I'm taking my shit. If I didn't want that stuff, I wouldn't have it. And then, as I'm taking my files out to my car, I hear the bullhorns blaring. And then began emergency mandatory evacuation. We were ready to go by that point, so we left our house for a much less comfortable evacuation center at Saugus High School (just where I wanted to be... right? no... never wanted to go back there). Then my mom and I realized we left some important stuff back at home, so we scrambled over, just as the lines were starting to get out, but we got it and left again. When we got back, people were saying the Saugus center was getting shut down, so we got back into the 3 car caravan to head up to the Golden Valley HS center, which was weird and creepy because it was in a gym with green cots and people staring at me. So I said I wanted to leave.. cuz fuck that game. And my dad and I got into an argument, resulting in me leaving to go over to Chelsea's house with Wendy's. After a bit, we decided to take a little walk with our bandit bandanas over our mouths. This resulted in us climbing a mountain to look out over the city... and writing FIRE with rocks, and taking flip pictures, and talking about how the mountain has eyes and arms but does not want hair, and how snakes might have hands and how pissed I would be if that were the case, almost getting blown off the mountain, and talking about how kids shouldn't ever be popped out of us... cuz we would be horrible parents. That was my day so far. I am safe, a little smokey and a lot tired, but happy my house and my family are not bbq charcoal. Now I have a room in my trunk, but I'm just going to buy boxes tomorrow and put it all in there since I'm moving in January anyway. It will be like a surprise once I do move. Hooray... I love surprising myself with my old junk...????


O yea... and thank you to everyone who has been offering to open their homes to those of us getting fucked by the fire. Chelsea and I were talking about it, and we both agree... awesome to know friends are thinking about us out there. Good to know we have somewhere to go if we need it and such awesome friends.

Worst day I've had in approximately 11 months.

For the first three people that reply to this post, and who re-post this challenge: you win.
For your prize, I will send you a gift.

It might be something I've made, or something cool from my hidden stash of fabulousity. It might be a mix CD, or a rubber duck, or a book I think you might enjoy. It could be a love letter, a useful object, or something else that is awesome or maybe just taking up room in my house.

Whatever it is, I promise I will get it to you in 365 days of your posted comment or less, and I will need your snail mail (or to see you in person.)

The only thing you need to do to receive your gift is PARTICIPATE.

Be one of the first three journalers to reply to this, and post this very same thing in your journal, and YOU are the lucky giftee.


^^^^^^^ Just because I'm the #1 STUNNA!

The past few weeks have been incredibly... great, to put it simply.

I've finally been going out on auditions because the summer lull is over and production is revving up again. The nerves I have developed over these last 7 years about speaking in front of people... or talking to anyone for that matter, have been quelled. I've always been incredibly shy, but when I was acting (age 4-12), I was rarely overwhelmingly frightened to talk, but once I left the business for high school and whatnot, the only place I felt comfortable enough to speak freely (besides around my friends) was when I was commanding in JROTC. If a teacher called on me, my hand raised or not, I would feel sick, get red, and my heart would pound uncontrollably. Let's not even get started on how scared I was to talk to anyone without being around them a minimum of like 12 times. For the most part, that is gone due to a few factors. Filming a movie certainly helped, and these auditions have pushed me out of my comfort zone, considering I have been portraying a lesbian in them... (hmmm what vibe am I putting off... thanks agent/manager). I noticed on the last one I went on, I was not even nervous walking into the room with the directors and producers, even though it was a callback. Rocky has certainly helped, and I feel like I'm developing a group of really awesome, interesting friends. I feel so much more comfortable in so many situations, with my personality, my body, and all that jazz... and I may be coming out of my Ryan funk... but I'm still a bit shy when it comes to boys.

Chelsea has quickly skanked her way into the position of best friend... and I'm tellin ya, we have more fun than anyone else. We own fun.

Chels and I started training to be listeners for CSUN Helpline, and that has been interesting. I'm psyched to be helping people, or at least just being there to listen to whatever people have to say... being someone they can vent to. I'm a bit ... concerned about how to deal with the difficult subjects, but I'm sure we will both get through it... especially while we draw pictures during quiet time.

I started coaching my Special Olympics floor hockey team. I haven't played hockey since I was 5... but... you know... it's not so much about the rules. However, this is my first time coaching an all youth team, and the first practice was terrifying. While the adult athletes have the mindset of preteens for the most part, they have had the time to develop a bit. The kids... have not... and I have a few violent ones. And... coincidentally the violent ones are about a foot taller than me, and recognize this. Not only that, but they all have wooden sticks... so it can be a bit painful at times. There was also a lot of yelling going on in the gym, from our practice and a few others, and that was quite overwhelming, not only for me, but for the kids, making them more agitated. But... I think I'll be able to get through it... cuz I'm not the one with incredibly difficult disabilities. Plus, the other sports I have coached have been the best experiences of my life, so each week I just have to go in and build the relationships, make it fun for them, help them with their motor skills, and be the friend/coach they need.

I'm doing well in my few classes... they are intesting... that is all.

Now... on to the amazingly fun Friday night/Saturday morning provided by Joseph. Not only did we get to see him play a wonderfully beautiful show, but we topped off the evening with a scavenger hunt planned by the lovely performer. My team consisted of myself, Chelsea, Chris, Sarah, Liz, and Nick. That was 4 hours of the most fun I think I have ever had. Not only was my group full of fantastically fun people (Joseph added to the fun when he became our driver NOT HELPER THOUGH), but we got into some of the most scandalous, ridiculous situations ever. Frolicking, planes, food service workers, and Chris's house have taken on new meanings... trust me on this. Then while going through the ridiculous photos of all the teams, I got hours of cuddle time courtesy of Nick. I've got to be honest, I didn't want to get up from that at the end of the "night," which ended around 6 am.

Saturday, after 2.5 hours of sleep, was football. I drove down to Bernie's, and we shopped a bit for his dragtastic, sinful preshow. He then sat me down to watch Army of Darkness because he was thoroughly appalled I had never seen it. A bit of Cal v Oregon and UCLA v Oregon St football served as a distraction before the best thing in the world: USC football. I would like to point out that Bernie watched quite a bit of the game in drag..... hmmmmmmmm. And, as usual, the rest of Saturday = Rocky. I drove back to Santa Clarita to get my partner in crime, Chelsea for the evening. Our drives the funniest things in the world. The show was quite cuddly, courtesy o' Nick again. 'Twas lovely again. Two nights of cuddles... call me a lucky ducky.

Now isn't all that fabulous... YES IT IS!

I am as lonely as I have ever been.

GAME TIME!

Hey so I finally finished a painting I've been working on for a week or two... so now that means I have nothing to do hooray. And... I already did all my classwork for the week. I guess I could start on next week, but that would be a little ridiculous to go from extreme procrastination to doing things early. I should work up to that I think.

I kind of set out to whine about stuff on here today... but then I thought hey... the things I'm whining about are pretty lame. So instead, I decided to think about the things I am enjoying at the moment. Maybe it will get me out of the funk I have been in for a week. So here we go!!!
1) USC football season starts one week from today! It's time for the Trojans to plow through the season holding onto the #1 rank. Saturday starts the months of tailgates with my family and the Goldsteins and now Bernie (haha finally someone who won't whine about the game being too long).
2) I have finally started painting again! I am just about finished with a painting I have been taking my time on. So I'm psyched about that because it gives me something to do I really enjoy.
3) In addition to writing this first entry, I am listening to Reel Big Fish and watching a marathon of USC Trojan Football Rewind, and I'm going to tell you, it doesn't get much better than that. It's funny how watching clips from the 2004 season can still get my heart pumping and throw a smile on my face faster than anything.
4) My car is awesome period enough said.
5) Ska... skanking... love it. It's not like it's a new thing for me, but honestly, I've gotta mention it in things that make me happy.
6) I'm going to Rocky tonight, which hasn't failed once to make me smile.
7) I went to Medieval Times last night! Yay for Jaafar Soussi's 18th birthday! Not yay for our knight or the large man sitting next to me talking about how to kill someone with the soup bowl...
8) Vanilla Bear (Chelsea) + Chocolate Bear (me) = mugs.

So yes... smiling is commencing. Just one thing though, I'm wondering when I will get emotions back. I have moderate emotions, but they aren't appropriate for any situation. Like coming back from Puerto Rico, I should have cried when I left because it was such an awesome time, but no. And I should have been excited to see my family and best buds waiting for me at the airport, but all I could muster was "Heeey..." And as far as boys go, I don't have any emotions... at all. Thanks a bunch Ryan... ha... but at this point I'm more amused than anything. Honestly wtf... 9 months should be enough to get over things. C'mon emotions, come on back.

-KT